#0009 Go Against The Grain

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Hey!

Welcome to another week. How you been?

For me, everything has been focussed on learning something new. Over the weekend, I completed my training to become a celebrant. For those who don't know, a celebrant is someone who has the ability to conduct non-religious ceremonies that celebrate the key moments in people's lives, such as weddings, funerals, and naming ceremonies.

I’ve told a few people, and their first reaction has been ‘What's a celebrant?' followed by ‘Why would you even do that?!’ or simply said “oh”. At first, I felt a way - not going to lie. But it was temporary when I remembered that this is something I’ve wanted to do for a while.

I also thought about how exciting it felt to read through the learning materials and discovering the intricacies of how to pull together a divorce ceremony - it's an actual thing - or a ‘croning’ ceremony which, though I hate the name, is the celebration of a woman who has hit 50. It's a great sentiment.

So, my message to you is to make sure you're seeking and experiencing new things that give you joy. If something lands in your heart, embrace it, go full steam ahead, and discount anything that doesn't affirm your choice.

So have a think - what's something new you could do just for you?

Until Monday, Loved One

I usually keep TBFN's content to these shores, but I had to highlight a post from a woman based Stateside that sparked discussion on our Instagram page.

A lady known on TikTok as plussizedfun shared her perspective on what happens to mature women when they’ve been celibate for too long. Friend, I need you to watch this video and let me know what you think either on the post or via email.

For me, her response was so multilayered and resonated hard, but threw up so many questions? Like could choosing abstinence be a response to the trauma and the s***show of modern dating or is it just natural to hit a point where you no longer have the tolerance for anything that doesn't bring you peace? At what point do we pause on blaming our childhood trauma for the way we function in relationships and seek therapy? I appreciated her reminder that platonic love can be as fulfilling as romantic love, but could that really be enough, or is it an excuse not to take emotional risks? Let me know what you think.

The theatre industry seems to have its feet to the coals of racism as they experience blow after blow for daring to do anything with or for Black people. The backlash is coming from everywhere, including the Prime Minister. 

This week, the Jamie Lloyd Company had to issue a statement condemning a “barrage of online racial abuse’ after it was revealed that their production of Romeo and Juliet will star the actress Francesca Amewudah-Rivers as Juliet opposite Spider-Man star Tom Holland’s Romeo. The company issued a statement that included the following:

“Following the announcement of our Romeo & Juliet cast, there has been a barrage of deplorable racial abuse online directed towards a member of our company. This must stop. We are working with a remarkable group of artists. We insist that they are free to create work without facing online harassment.”

Not even a month ago, audiences were up in arms after discovering that the production team behind the forthcoming “Slave Play” at the Noël Coward Theatre were planning to host Blackout performances. A commonality in the States, Blackout nights are where tickets are prioritised for those from the Black communities so they can consume the play in a way that feels safe and accessible. Journalist Precious Adesina talks about the Blackout backlash in this article for The Lead.

In my work as a publicist in the creative space, it’s becoming more and more necessary to create crisis communications plans for those who are delivering any creative work that prominently features Black people. In fact, it’s a must.

Theatre companies need to make sure they are safeguarding their talent irrespective of race and whether they are on stage or behind the scenes. They can do this by providing them with safe spaces to speak with counsellors, take advice from cultural specialists on how to safeguard their cast and crew, and by standing firm and condemning abuse publicly. In this instance, I also think they should do some press with Francesca and Tom, not necessarily to address the abuse directly but to show solidarity.

Sending postive energy to Francesca - I'm sure she's going to be great.

Congratulations to husband and wife team Ken and Mary Okarafor, also known as The Humble Penny. Their new book Financial Joy: Banish Debt, Grow Your Money and Unlock Financial Freedom in 10 weeks has just become an instant Sunday Times Bestseller.

The duo who started off on social media, and have since gone on to appear often ITV’s This Morning, are a part of a growing number of Black people writing books on how we can make the most of our money. This includes Selina Flavius, who wrote Black Girl Finance: Let’s Talk Money and Bola Sol, the author of How To Save It: Fix Your Finances and the forthcoming Your Money Life out in August.

Here’s the description for the book:

Stop worrying about money. Start enjoying your life.

Authors Ken and Mary Okoroafor started out as resource-poor, working-class immigrants and have built a life of financial independence and joyful moments through hard work, smart saving and savvy investing. They know what it feels like to start from ground zero, and as a chartered accountant and former CFO, Ken shares his financial expertise to help you unlock the secret to building wealth.

You'll learn how to take control of your finances, develop good money habits, become debt-free, invest in assets and multiply your income so you can create the freedom to travel, spend time with your loved ones and plan for a stress-free (early) retirement - all whilst prioritising your wellbeing and having fun!

It also includes a dozen real-life interviews with singles, couples and those with children, from different backgrounds, age groups and stages of their money journey, including a few well-known public figures.

Financial joy can be achieved by anyone - and it can start today, not tomorrow.

This week’s Mister Mention is inspired by Dumi Oburota. Dumi has been on my radar since he launched Disturbing London, the home of artists such as Tinie Tempah. An avid businessman, Dumi has explored a number of ventures, his latest being, Severan, a black British owned and funded sparkling wine brand.

According to My London News, the brand is doing well and is available at locations such as The Conduit, The Standard, and 67 Pall Mall. It will also be available on Amazon - which feels like a bit of a mismatch to me, to be honest - but it’s great to hear of the rise of a brand owned by us.

Dumi’s progress reminded me of a Black British female owned brand called Étan which I came across a few years ago. The award-winning rum is the brainchild of five London-based sisters - Laura, Briget, Noella, Kareen, and Caroline - originally from Cameroon. 

On what inspired their journey, Laura said in an interview also with My London News "When my dad died in 2016 we wanted to create something that united us five sisters and give a nod to our heritage, upbringing and all the fun times. We decided to create our own brand of rum!". A reenforcement of my message earlier on to try something new!

I have seen many of our American counterparts build unicorn businesses in the alcohol space, including Fawn Weaver, founder of Uncle Nearest, who recently had her premium whisky company valued at an incredible $900m. It's highly unusual to see women, let alone British women, in this space so Étan really stuck out for me and though the landscape is distinctly different here, I hope they too can see the possibilities for their success.

Congratulations to both brands for breaking into the market.

• British generosity: The UK is loaning back African gold it stole. Is it the best it can do? - Big News Network

• ‘Celebrating our sisters’ Danielle Bridge - Collette Philip

• 1Xtra Comedy Gala: 'There is space for black women in comedy' - BBC

• Arlo Parks: Beyoncé songwriting credit on Cowboy Carter was ‘beautiful surprise’ - The Independent